James Tillich’s Concession Speech, U.S. Presidential Election of 2012 (complete transcript) by Paul Ewing, November 7, 2012 at 5:00 a.m. Arizona time
Four score and seven minutes ago I officially conceded the 2012 U.S. Presidential election. Mr. Obama, Congratulations! You won it fair and square. I didn’t have a chance. You all knew that. But I am far from bitter about the outcome. This is not my swan song. This is my STRATEGY (crowd murmurs). The NPA threw my hat into the ring this year for higher stakes next time. In four years I will campaign for PRESIDENT OF THE WORLD! (applause). My mission in 2020 will be to run for SUPREME COMMANDER OF THE SOLAR SYSTEM (loud applause). And in 2024, with Captain Kirk and the Prime Directive as our guide, the Nihilist Party of America will rocket to farthest reaches of the galaxy. Twelve years from 2012, I will campaign for [Lengthy pause] MASTER OF THE MILKY WAY AND THE UNIVERSE! (crowd goes wild for two minutes).
More important than all of the above is my deepest gratitude to each and every one of you for your attendance, participation, and creative contributions. My bottomless, non-existent heart thanks you. From where being ends and nothingness begins, I remain…Never Yours…James Tillich, The Man Who Never Existed. Tillich out!
